From the Notebook #4

Be Thankful #3

Sorry I kind of fell off the map for the last week. Last week was CRAZY.

I'm thankful for God being present and active in all the crazy stuff I go through, both the good and the bad.

I'm thankful for a GREAT spring break! Two trips to Yosemite with great friends, three days of a sports camp for kids, the best, God-redeemed swing dance night, and a crazy-stressful weekend that God demonstrated His power throughout!

I'm thankful for my friendship with Daniel Haynes. (and check out his nifty, new blog here)

I'm thankful that my boss is also a great friend and man of God.

I'm thankful that even my best efforts blow up in my face and cause me to make a fool out of myself. It reminds me that everything worth having is given by the grace of God and not because of my "merit".

I'm thankful that God is orchestrating my future.

I'm thankful for grace offered by Godly men.

I'm thankful for family, both mine and others.

And I'm thankful that great things in life do not come easily. It makes me appreciate them so much more when I do eventually get them. Some things are worth all the effort in the world.

God, may your name be glorified in our lives. May many people come to experience your love directly and through us, and may they come to know You, Father.

"Anything that comes easily and without sacrifice is rarely significant." -Cameron Strang, Relevant Magazine

Life Lessons #1: Yosemite Hiking Trip

(This column will list some good lessons that I've learned through everyday situations.)

1. The path that you think will be easier is sometimes much harder.

2. Sometimes turning back is harder than just pressing forward.

3. Working on a challenge that isn't too easy or too hard for you can distract you from the discomfort of that challenge.

4. Any challenge is better faced with others, rather than alone.

5. If there is a challenge ahead of you that's really hard, but it also must be done, it is a lot easier to do.

6. After you've done something really hard, things that were only hard before are now easy.

7. Always get two extra-large pizzas, not just one.

The Big Picture #2: Wanting to Know the Future

So I recently got into a special academic program at my university. Because of that, I know exactly what classes I'm going to be taking next semester. I have guaranteed spots in my classes for the first time. This is a good thing and a bad thing.

I like the fact that I don't have to struggle to get classes next semester, but I don't like actually knowing what my schedule will look like this early on.

As some of you know, I like to keep everything in my life straight and organized. I don't like forgetting about commitments or losing track of time during big projects. But now that I know my schedule next semester, it's firmly planted on my radar screen, and it's stressing me out.

I often think that the solution to my anxiety about the future is figuring out what it'll look like (such as knowing what classes I'll be taking next semester.) Surely, if I can just know what'll happen to me, I won't be worrying anymore. Surely, if God in His infinite wisdom would just tell me what'll happen, then I could stop worrying.

But if I knew what was going to happen to me in my life, I probably wouldn't want to do it. How much suffering is ahead of me still? How many friends' and family deaths are yet to happen? How many lost jobs, lost opportunities? How many harsh, heart-damaging wounds will I take? How many will I give to others? Others that I love? How many sicknesses, how many cancers will I face before I leave this world?

I don't want to know about those things. I don't want to see my future. Because, as sure as the sun rises in the morning, I would surely focus on the negatives and the pain in my future if I were to see it.

How many joys will I experience? How many people will I get to see put their faith in Christ? How many will I lead there? How much will I get to love my wife? How many times will I get the privilege of sacrificing my desires and rights for her sake? How many times will I get to hang out with my kids at the park on a Saturday afternoon? How much thankfulness will well up in my heart to God on account of the future blessings and faithfulness that He will shower down on me in the future?

My desire to know the future is not the root desire. There is an underlying one, hidden deep in my motives. What I really want is to know that everything will be okay. Knowing the future is just a means to that end, and not a very effective means at that. I would desire to see with my own eyes and determine that everything is okay. But God speaks with words formed from a vision unhindered. Nothing is hidden from His eyes. He has planned amazing things for us, and He tells us to trust Him that it is good; that everything will be okay. Things that I would think are bad He would say are good, and He would be right. Things that I would avoid He would want me to go through.

So if I can take God at His word, I can have complete peace about the future right now. It is God who orchestrates it, it is God who will lead us.

"But seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousnes, and all these things will be added to you." -Matthew 6:33

Visual Messages #1: Resurrection Loon

Hey, check it out! A new column! This column will showcase art that I've done that I feel has an important message to convey (so not just my normal school assignments, haha)

Here's a piece I painted that I called "Resurrection Loon":


Resurrection Loon by *simon38 on deviantART

The above link will take you to my deviantart.com page, so, totally safe.

I made this in my Interaction of Color class as my final. The assignment was to make an original design in the cultural style of a certain people group. I chose the Tlingkit people of the Northwest Coast Native Americans.

In my brainstorming and research, I learned that these groups of Native Americans actually hated loons. They made an eerie sound that made them the object of negative folklore. But, you see, I like loons, so I thought I'd make a flying, elegant-looking loon in response.

At the same time, I definitely wanted to stamp my faith in Jesus on this piece somehow, because it's the most important thing about me. I put an open tomb on his belly, symbolizing our Lord Jesus' resurrection from the dead. Just like people have the wrong idea about loons, people definitely have the wrong idea about Jesus. But that doesn't change the facts. Loons are awesome. And Jesus rose from the dead.

From the Notebook #3

(I apologize for the sporadic posts these last two weeks. School's been crazy. I hope to be back to consistent daily posts ASAP.)

From My Reading #4: Impossible Odds

In honor of the fact that I got one of the thirteen available spots in the Fine Art Graphic Design program at my university despite an incomplete portfolio, a horribly-less-than-perfect academic record, and an application letter that should have disqualified me, I give you this edition of From My Reading:

Referring to the Feeding of the Five Thousand in John 6:1-14...

"In God's economy, 5 + 2 = 5,000 with a remainder of 12.

They actually end up with more than what they started with after feeding five thousand people. And God is glorified because He defied impossible odds. It honestly doesn't matter how many Moabites you're facing. It doesn't matter how tall the Egyptian giant is. And the size of the lion isn't really an issue.

The issue is this: How big is your God?"

-Mark Batterson, In A Pit With A Lion On A Snowy Day

Just For Fun #2

Check out this guy's blog here and his other videos here.

Get Real: Brutal Honesty for Brutal Times #2

Why I Consistently Get Up Late on School Days

Every morning, my alarm goes off exactly an hour and a half before my first class starts. And every morning, I turn it off and go back to sleep.

Every morning, I'll wake up again about an hour before my first class starts. And every morning, I justify fifteen minutes more sleep.

Every morning, I sit up in my bed forty-five minutes before my first class starts. And every morning, I don't want to get up.

I worry about what I have to do that day. I get frustrated at the fact that I'm not where I want to be in life yet. I stress out about how I'm going to get ready and get to class on time, since I'm now behind.

When the fear of being late overcomes my other worries and stresses (not to mention fatigue), I get out of bed. After I turn on the shower, I'll read some Bible, get on my knees, and pray to God. 95% of the time, I have to just confess my out-of-control worries, desires, and stresses. Then God starts to reset my perspective.

I thank Him for His faithfulness, for His promise to take care of my needs and bless me in the future. I declare that I just want to dwell with Him, know His peace that defies my circumstances, and effectively love people today better than the day before.

But a lot of the time, I still feel... burdened.

Why?

I definitely don't have the full answer of why this happens each morning, but I do have some thoughts about this.

1. I think that I feel burdened much of the time in the morning because, though I trust God to bless me in the future, I don't believe that any of those blessings will come that day. Things of great value tend to take a long time to come. You don't build a house in a day, at least not one you'll actually want to live in. It takes a while. A long while. Some days can feel like nothing more than a holding pattern; just flying around the airport in circles waiting to land (especially if you feel unworthy or unable to land.)(Of course, God does give blessings daily, and joy and peace come later in the day.)

2. I read the Bible EVERY DAY, but I fail to live by the truth of God EVERY DAY. You can read the entire bible and completely miss the point; completely miss God. (John 5:39-40) God is more than just a bunch of characteristics ABOUT Him that we assemble together. It's when we believe that He will actually apply His characteristics in relationship to us that we begin to actually know God. If you remember that God will judge you, but forget His grace for you, you have a distorted, inaccurate picture of God. If I wake up to the knowledge that God will bless me later, but forget that He will walk with me every step of this day, offering love, grace, counsel, joy, peace, hope, a shining sun for my path, beautiful plants to remind me of His blessing, beautiful people to know and love deeper and deeper, and a promise of eternal life; a promise that anything that goes bad that day does not ultimately define me or hinder me, then I walk with blinded eyes and a heavy heart. I walk untruthfully. The truth is there to be had if I would just go after it.

So I will keep setting my alarm to go off an hour and a half before my first class. I will keep getting on my knees before my heavenly Father. I will keep waiting on Him, looking to Him alone for the fulfillment of hope for my future, both the distant future as well as that very day, for God wants to do great, powerful, healing, sin-crushing, despair-erasing, joy-inspiring things in my life (and your life!) each and every day, and to open my eyes (and yours!) to what He has already done in Jesus' death and resurrection. That's what it means to live in light of the Gospel!

Be Thankful #2

I'm thankful for the liberation of God from the fear of life circumstances.

I'm thankful that my value as a person isn't defined by my performance.

I'm thankful for such great Godly friends from the Lord!

I'm thankful for the great opportunities that are hidden in fearful situations.

I'm thankful for Psalm 146, and the God who inspired it!

I'm thankful for the (God-given) ability to love people tangibly and effectively.

And I'm thankful for the fact that God is not defined or hindered by my flawed perception of Him.